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Lost my kitty Leia.

Lost my kitty Leia

Here is Leia a few months ago lying in a flower pot on our front porch. She was always finding her special little spots to lay down.

Leia in flower pot.

Leia in flower pot.

For the past week or so our kitty Leia had been sleeping a lot and not playing with Lionel our other cat.  We thought she was just going through her teenage years, so to speak.  Or we thought maybe she was hibernating, (we didn’t know if cats do this), since it’s wintertime.  So we thought she was having the luxurious life of getting to sleep all day on our couch etc.  We had no idea that she was sick and I have learned a big lesson.  I wish I could have protected Leia from her illness and got her well but I do accept that I’m imperfect and just didn’t know. 

My sweetest and dearest kitty Leia had come down with pneumonia.  On Sunday we awoke  to find her gasping for air, breathing very rapidly and with a raspy and gurgly voice.  All vet offices were closed on Sunday so we took her to the emergency animal clinic in a nearby town.  They assessed her situation and said that it was an emergency and that she could “go south” very quickly.  We had them put her in the oxygen room to help her to catch her breath.  Even with the oxygen she was still breathing with difficulty.

The vet took ex-rays and found that one lung was all full with water and the other lung was 3/4 way full.  It would be well over $1000 to do treatment but could give no guarantee that she would be okay.  We made the difficult decision to put her to sleep. 

My Sunday was very difficult as I cried all day.  Then my night wasn’t good either as I lay awake.  Monday I wouldn’t let myself think of her except briefly as I needed to rest.  Tuesday I had a meeting to go to in the evening and didn’t want my eyes all swollen from crying.  Wednesday I mourned my kitty all day crying.  My eyes just now start to cry just thinking of her once again.  I loved her so much.  She was my little baby.  I would hold her in my arms just like a baby and she would fall asleep. She wanted to be with Ron and I all the time, we were her surrogate mother. 

I will miss her very much.  I’ve gone through feelings of guilt and wondering if we made the right decision.  A dear friend asked her vet friend about my situation and he said that Leia’s chances of survival were small considering how her lungs were full of water.  I’ve never grieved anyone dying, a person or animal like I have for this kitty.  Grief sure does hurt. 

Leia loved our wagon.  Our other kitty never goes in the wagon.  When I put her outside for fresh air a few days before she died she went up into the wagon and stayed in it all day.  I thought it was kind of strange but then thought she just loves soaking up the sun on the warm wood of the wagon.

Leia in wagon.

Leia in wagon.

 Here Leia is learning to chase birds.  Her chances of getting the bird in this tree are slim unless she can learn to fly.

Leia chasing a bird.

Leia chasing a bird.

Leia was a special kitty that will always be remembered.

Have any of you lost a pet and know how I am feeling?

5 Responses to “Lost my kitty Leia.”

  1. Rose Lee says:

    So sorry to hear of your loss. It is tough to go through a loss when you are so attached to your pet. Remember,ask God to give you peace about your loss. He can help. Love you. Aunt Rose

  2. Tamara Bonet says:

    Thank you Aunt Rose. I have been praying and thanking God for the precious animals that he’s entrusted for us to care for. I’m thankful I was able to spend time with her. I’m feeling a little better each day. Thanks for writing a note on my blog. :-)

    Love,
    Tamara

  3. Lisey aka Elise says:

    I just wanted to tell you how truly sorry I am to read of your loss. I myself had two cats one lived to be 15 and the other 17. In short we have never gotten another since they passed. It was absolutly horrible losing them I still cry time to time when I think of them and its been two years since our last one passed away “Mo Mo”. Animals are part of the family I am sure your Leia was very blessed to have you as an owner and I am most certain you gave her the best life a cat could ask for. Your beautiful photos show that although her life was shorter than expected while here with you she enjoyed every minute:)
    So truly sorry
    Lisey

  4. Tamara Bonet says:

    Lisey,

    Thank you for those kind words. I can tell that you completely understand with your losing your 2 cats after all those years of knowing them. Part of what made the loss so hard was that Leia was a baby and had so much more life to live. Also, I had guilt to work through for not recognizing that she was sick. I’ll never do that again. Now I know that when a cat changes behavior I should think maybe they’re sick. The good part is that she had the life while she was alive. I’d even give her little leg massages and rub around her eyes for face massage to put her to sleep. She was my little baby.

    One friend said that I shouldn’t let the grief stop me from opening my heart to another kitty because she said that animals give us so much. I’ll see if later on in the summer I might get another kitty. We still have our one kitty but he’s Mr.Independant (Lionel is his name) and in that way very different emotionally speaking from Leia. He’s special in his own way though.
    Thanks again for your thoughts,
    Tamara

  5. Lisey aka Elise says:

    I truly hope you do get another someday your friend is right. With me I always found in the past they seem to come my way example my last cat I had adopted while working at an animal hospital and it was one of those odd situations because I had stated to my fiance I wanted a Persian within two weeks of saying that a red Persian “Mo Mo” came into the hospital terribly ill he was only two years old and had liver damage from poisening long story short the minute the owner brought him through the door I knew I was somehow going to end up with him and sure enough she was a college student who opted to put him to sleep due to the care needed I begged her to adopt him over to me and after feeding him mushed up boiled chicken through srynges for two weeks and precsriptions he came around. It turned out even more “meant to be” as his prior owner signed him over she expressed how she had recently left her parents house and her parents had a cat who was “Mo Mo’s” best friend she felt he was deppressed after leaving. I showed her photos of my oldest cat a Maine Coone and she had to sit down he was a spitting image of her parents cat “Mo Mo’s” prior best friend and thankfully my oldest cat did in fact become “Mo Mo’s new best friend. Many years later when we had our daughters “Mo Mo” tolerated and loved them with his Persian look of disgust (haha) he would allow them to carry him around like a baby. Anyway it has always seemed as though when you are ready one will appear either at your door,perhaps you will save her from a shelter. I hope you do open your heart to another one day perhaps I will too. I truly hope you stop feeling guilty about her illness and instead look how happy you made her while she was here. Looking at those photos she is beaming in every single one.
    Best wishes
    Lisey

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